You know the feeling, when you start a film or book, that you are in good hands? That there is something about the way the story is told, through the pictures and dialogue, that gives you a secure feeling that you are in the hands of someone who knows what the fuck he’s doing, and will take you somewhere worthwhile?
Well that is precisely the feeling women want to feel when they are with you. That is really all that matters – everything else is water under the bridge. If you wish for mutually satisfactory relationship with a girl, then you need to know what it is you are doing. You need to know what you want, and how exactly you intend to get it. This is not, as some would have you believe, smutty or craven. This is an acknowledgement of the reality that she is a woman, and you are a man, and there is much joy to be had between you, so long as each plays their role and does their steps in the dance of love and sexuality.
Too often I and other intelligent guys forego these steps, and for several reasons. First, it seems overly boring – we want to recreate the dance from scratch, according to our own rules. We think it’s boring because we are overthinking it instead of simply living it – and perhaps you expect the girl has some out of this world expectation of what you and your romance should be like (hint: she doesn’t. She just wants you to know what you want – her – and how to get it). If the girl is interesting to you at all, you will enjoy it. We are avoiding our own organismic feedback, and instead are in our heads. Which is never where we should (primarily) be when we are with a girl.